Gosh, there sure are a lot of gorgeous folks in Music. So it would, at least, appear to favor the physically fortunate. It’s funny how nobody’s ever come right out and said that being a patently unattractive person is a liability in Music. Because Music (videos aside) is an auditory medium that’s not to be readily lumped-in with the visual arts, like acting. On the contrary, Music is a creative’s endeavor; where one’s creative ability should supersede one’s physical appearance. In the same way that a book cannot be judged by its cover; a Musician’s genes are not outwardly expressed in good looks. And no doubt, if pressed, you could site one or two successful exponents of the “visually unsightly” in the Music World. After all, looks aren’t supposed to matter, right? Right? Hello? Anyone, anyone, Bueller? Have I lost you, dear reader? Of course, the reality of the matter is that the public has certain expectations of what their Rock Musicians look like. And this is notably so in the Popular genre. Go ahead and picture the archetype Musician in your mind’s eye. Is he ugly?
LYRICS:
[Guitar Riff Intro]
That girl is hot
She’s the cream of the crop
She gonna chew you up; Spit you out
Rip you up; Tear you down
Take everything that you got
That girl is mean
She’s a wrecking machine
She gonna step on your little heart
Then you’ll see; You’re not as smart
As you thought you could be
But I… I got a secret
And I… Know something you ought to know
When you’re ugly; You’re ugly
And when you’re ugly; It’s mean
[Guitar Riff Reprise] Yeah!
That girl is hot
And she never will stop
Just like an oil spill, She will kill
Anything in her way
Rising up to the top
That girl is mean
She’ll grab a hold of your thing
And then she’ll step on it, step on it
Step on it, step on it!
Like she stepped on my dream
But I… I got a secret
And I…
Know something you don’t want to know:
That when you’re ugly; You’re ugly
And when you’re ugly…
Well it’s the meanest thing
Meanest thing, in the world
To be ugly…Oh God, to be ugly!
That’s when you’re ugly…Like me (ha, ha, ha)